Published on May 6, 2024
Crack the German code: Your guide to making friends in Germany
Moving to a new country and building a whole new social circle can be an intimidating experience. This is especially true in Germany, where the culture can seem reserved and the language impossible to master.
This guide will provide you with actionable advice on how to make new friends in Germany and navigate German friendship dynamics. From meeting people in various settings to understanding the cultural nuances that influence social interactions, there’s a lot to learn! But it’s important not to get discouraged and to focus on the end goal: building meaningful, long-lasting connections in your new home.
Whether you find it easy or hard to make friends in Germany will likely depend on your personal experiences and specific circumstances. It can be easier to make friends in a large, cosmopolitan city like Berlin, especially if you’re the outgoing type. On the other hand, you may struggle to penetrate the social dynamics of a more rural setting.
Understanding the local social dynamics and adopting the right approach can significantly ease the process. Here’s what you need to know:
In cosmopolitan areas like Berlin, Munich and Hamburg, the presence of diverse, multinational communities creates a more open social environment. These cities host various social events, expat meetups and cultural exchanges that facilitate new connections. In smaller towns and rural areas, social networks can be more insular, and penetrating these circles may require more time and effort.
Germans are known for their formality in initial encounters and their direct manner of communication. Understanding this can help prevent misunderstandings. For example, while Germans may seem reserved at first, this formality is a sign of respect and should not be interpreted as unfriendliness.
Social activities in Germany are often planned well in advance, and punctuality is highly prized. Impromptu gatherings are less common, so it’s a good idea to get into the habit of scheduling and sticking to plans.
It’s difficult to make friends staying at home, so try to put yourself in as many social situations as possible. Here are some suggestions:
Friendships in Germany are generally sincere and long-lasting. Germans tend to value deeper connections rather than numerous acquaintances, so once a friendship is formed, it often becomes a trusted and loyal bond.
Germans generally prioritize quality over quantity in their friendships. Unlike some cultures where it’s common to have a large circle of friends one might meet casually, Germans often maintain a smaller group of close friends.
These friendships are built on deep mutual respect and a shared history, often developed over many years. For example, it’s common for Germans to remain close friends with their schoolmates throughout their lives.
Once you’ve made a friend in Germany, that person is likely to be extremely reliable. A German friend will typically stand by your side in times of need, offering help and support without hesitation. For instance, if you move to a new apartment, it’s typical for German friends to offer practical help with the move, bringing tools and supplies and dedicating a day to assist you.
Building new friendships in Germany can take time, as Germans often approach new relationships with caution. Initial meetings may be marked by formality and reserve, which should not be interpreted as a lack of interest.
Once trust is established, Germans are known for their deep loyalty and supportiveness. For instance, an invitation to someone’s home in Germany signifies a meaningful bond and trust, rather than a mere social formality.
Learning how to find friends in Germany involves a deep understanding of local customs and proactive participation in community life. By engaging in community activities, respecting cultural norms and showing genuine interest in those you meet, you can establish rewarding friendships that greatly enhance your experience in Germany.
