Updated on January 3, 2024
What’s the difference between who and whom?
The pronoun “who” is used far more frequently in English than “whom”, but when should one use the puzzling and formal word “whom”? To put it simply “who” acts as the subject in a sentence, whilst “whom” acts as an object. Easier said than done perhaps. Even for native English speakers, knowing when to use “who” or “whom” can be confusing. Most people don’t often use “whom” in spoken English, at least not in casual conversation. If you are writing or speaking formally, however, you will need to know how to use both words correctly. So here is our quick guide to the correct use of “who” and “whom”.
“Who” and “whom” are both used as interrogative pronouns; that is to say they are question words, which stand in for the noun you are asking about in the sentence. They refer to persons only, not to things.
As you can see in these examples, you must use “who”, and never “whom” when the person referred to (Joe in the above examples) is the subject (the actor or doer) of the sentence.
Strictly speaking, you should use “whom” when referring to the object of the sentence, which is Alfie in the above sentences. However, in everyday spoken English, you would rarely hear someone use “whom”. In the examples above, you would just use “who” in ordinary conversation.
However, people do usually use the ‘whom’ after the preposition, as in when a sentence is begun with “to whom”, “with whom” or “for whom”, etc.
So if you are beginning a sentence with “to whom”, “for whom”, “with whom” etc, it sounds better to use “whom”. But in English, it’s common to move the preposition to the end – e.g. who did you give the glasses to?
“Who” and “whom” are also used as relative pronouns, meaning words that introduce a dependent/relative clause.
Once again, “who” is used for the sentence subject, as in the following examples:
“Whom” is the correct form as she is the object of the relative clause, but is not usually used in the first sentence. In the second example, ‘whom’ would be used as it follows a preposition – to whom, for whom, with whom, etc.
We hope you now have a fairly good understanding of the use of “who” and “whom” in English. Keep in mind that “who” is always a subject pronoun and “whom” is always an object pronoun and soon you will be able to use them intuitively. With some practice you will be using it as naturally as a native speaker, and possibly even better, as many native English speakers will not be aware of the grammar rules you have learned here.
